it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
