NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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