no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize