I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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