Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I am puke
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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