The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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