mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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