Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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