So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
we're making bets on your personal life
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize