it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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