I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I am in a vortex of obligation.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
