She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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