yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
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