dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
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