dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Randomize
