wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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