I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
