perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
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