Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
