I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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