Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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