He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
