I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
