but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
