you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
My vagina just recognized that song.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
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