Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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