i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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