when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
