That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Ketchup is God's man juice
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Randomize
