playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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