they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
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