i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
