just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize