she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Randomize