...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
