My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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