So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Randomize
