I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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