I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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