Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
