If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize