Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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