So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize