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Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
