If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize