2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
