I just saw a hot homeless man
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize