We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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