i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
