in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Randomize