We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
